Trusting Others

“Do you know how special you are??”  

“Do you know how inspirational you are??”  

“Do you know how beautiful you are??” 

These are the heart-felt compliments that all came to me this month.    And as each sister looked into my eyes to lovingly ask me…my instinctual response was “No” (said with a smile).

And it is this response that causes me to take pause and THINK.    Do I really not know how special, inspirational, and beautiful I am???   But…this is what I teach.    Shouldn’t I be comfortable with my own radiant attributes???   Should I not instinctually respond “Yes!!   Thank You For SEEing Me!!!”

Well…I’ll tell you what I learned from questioning myself.

I realized that I currently hold strong belief patterns that detach me from the compliments AND criticisms of others.      It wasn’t my own knowing that I was denying…it was a natural denial of how OTHERS saw me.  

That’s profound…and sad.   But it’s TRUE!!

I listen to the compliments of others…and I honor that the thoughts are genuinely felt in THIS moment.    But I don’t easily honor that the compliments ARE truth!!

Beginning quite early in my life…I watched someone I loved and respected compliment me with great admiration one day…and then, with equal passion and intensity, criticize my actions or essence on another day.     This taught me to find INNER strength and truth.  Which is fabulous.    But it also taught me to de-value the compliments AND criticisms of others!!

And then…as i grew older (and until quite recently)…this belief system was further enforced as I watched people that I loved and honored…speak of great love, admiration and care in one moment….and then shift “their” perspective of me to one of disappointment (without rational cause or reason) in another moment.

That’s sad!!    I never realized how deeply I dis-trust the opinions of others…when those opinions regard ME.

I thought that by not allowing the thoughts of others to define me…I was STRONG.     BUT…I can now see that I am missing out on some of the greatest BLESSINGS in life!!!     I do NOT wish to move forward with these limiting thoughts and beliefs!!

But HOW do I break this patterning, re-program my heart to trust, and heal the scars that these past experiences have left within??

I am going to begin by screaming affirmations of LOVE to myself and the universal energies that be!!      Perhaps THIS moment of recognition and awareness IS the greatest part of the challenge…and from this moment forward all that is needed is INTENTION and FAITH!!   So…here are my heart-felt affirmations for today:

Dear Spirit:

I AM LOVE!!!

I Choose To LOVE Genuinely…and BE LOVED Completely!!

I HONOR THE BEAUTIFUL SOULS WHO SURROUND ME…and Accept Their Words As Expressions of Their Genuine LOVE and TRUTH!!      

 May Those Who Deserve My Respect and Trust…HAVE IT…Fully and Completely!!

And…IF there is greater truth for me to comprehend…reveal it to me!!   I am ready to heal, receive, and LOVE…fully and completely!!!!

THANK YOU!!!! ♥ 

I can easily admit that it was not even easy to write the last two affirmations.    I want to TRUST completely…but experience has taught me that no matter how much I genuinely LOVE….people can and sometimes do turn on you.    And although I hold NO blame (honestly)…it is natural for me to protect myself.

Well Spirit…I don’t want to walk around protecting myself!!!!!    I want to truly remember how SAFE and LOVED i am in ALLLLLLLLL moments!!    So please…work your super all~powerful mojo on me…and help me to LOVE and BE LOVED COMPLETELY!!!!

Without wondering HOW…I am trusting that the healing process has already begun!!

THANK YOU!!! ♥   Thank You for encouraging me to see myself clearly!!    Please continue to walk with me…guiding me and loving me…truly and completely!!!

I honor ALL who bravely walk with me on this beautiful path of self-discovery!!

And…for all my brothers and sisters who find themselves in a similar space of protective survival…BLAST OPEN THE WALLS OF LIMITATION TO LOVE ♥ LOVE ♥ LOVE!!!!     We are certainly worthy of that…and oh so much more!!!

In Faith and Eternal BLISS,

Alania

4 Comments Add yours

  1. luggagelady says:

    You go girl! Thanks for this incredible, soulful message. You are certainly not alone…My post “Hearts Shielded by Anonymity” touches on finding the courage to put oneself “out there” in spite of societal indifference. It is my top-rated page! I’m fairly certain we are in good company, my dear friend! 😉 Hugs and blessings coming your way… xoxo

    1. Alania says:

      I love you!! 🙂 You make my heart SOAR as i feel your heart-felt power flow right on over to me!!!! Thank YOU Sister!! I HEAR YOU!!! And i’m heading right on over to your blog now!! See you soon!!! xoxoxo

    1. Alania says:

      Back at’chya beautiful!!! ♥

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